Grief and unconditional love...

 

Grief...of course I'm a counsellor, so I deal with other peoples grief all the time, but it's my own experience, as per usual, that teaches us the most sometimes

My Mum went into a coma, it had felt like we'd already 'lost' her to Alziemers, 'who she was' what we used to talk about felt like such a long time ago - over five years she literally 'slipped' away.  It kind of felt like she was the one preparing us for it.  She would hate to upset anybody, ever, she was the most unconditional giving, loving mother you could ever wish for.

Of course, that didn't stop us fighting when I was around 14, I had her determination and 'I will do this' strength - but that was just a blip, we remained best of friends from then on.  I could have been jealous of others, if I'd been that type, because she collected other 'children' so many other people ended up calling her 'Mum'. 

Take the path of least resistance!

It’s like l’ve slipped through into another world, someone mentioned the ‘faraway tree’ series of books, it reminds me of that!  We mustn’t forget the ‘magic’ of play and being in the flow, of what ‘we feel’   We are at a very powerful portent of energy, with the new moon from 9^th April, we women know all about the moon, we are in touch with it constantly, whether or not we want to be with, monthly cycles.

Yes, I’ve stepped through into this abundant world, where everything exciting happens that you dream of, and yes I can take you there too!  It’s strange how sometimes, accepting abundance can be a little daunting? 

What! I hear you say, but any major change can take a little getting used to.  Sometimes we look back and realise what we’ve accepted, because we thought we were powerless.  When in fact it is, just like a switch.

Sometimes though, it can take a little preparation before pressing the switch.  Well, if things aren’t in the right place, or we’re not ‘seeing it’ how we could, it can change everything?

Let’s face it, if it isn’t working now, then you’ve got to change something to make it work, simple as yeah?

What if I could put you on the right road, step by step? Would you take my hand, would you go for a different way to change now, to get on the right path?

Wouldn't it be better to take the path of least resistance? yes I'm kind of a rebel woman too, but really? sometimes it's about NOT being so immovable for your own good!

In just 49 days enjoy your life!

Or 49 days to be a fantastic ‘role model’ of confidence for your life or business

49 days to YOU becoming, and stepping onto the road that will take you to fulfilling your real dreams!

The only way, I know that can happen, is because I’ve done it too, and not only that, I’ve shown many women ‘how to’.  It’s a journey, not only do I know, and believe you can get there, I now know, that you can have all you want in your life, your personal life or your business, it is possible!

A lot of the work needed to get there is all about mindset. Aha! I hear you say.  Yes, you do have to do something, but believe me, not too much.  Some people ‘get’ it in an instant, some are further away, that’s okay we’re all different.  Of course depending on what you want, decides how much work you may have to put into it.

This month for me has been a lot of de-cluttering, and believe me decluttering shifts energy like you wouldn’t believe! I would advise this step for great changes, combined with my Cinderella to Princess course to begin to enjoy life like a Princess!  Why? that’s because sweetie you are one!  We just have to take off all the baggage loading you down, it feels like you’re a bag lady buried under all the coats at a party!

When really, you should be out there enjoying yourself! Now! Honestly, life isn’t supposed to be that difficult, and when you have a few guidelines to follow, then everything can just slot into place!

I truly want that for you, and so many other women in the world, it is time you took your own power back and found who you are again – Okay let’s do this step by step, one step at a time…

Now...take my hand...

Relationships and growth

 

Welcome to my window sill!

 

Growth can cause expansion, a need for change in

many different ways.  Plants need to be able to reach

out their roots to become their true potential, to

produce fruit.

 

If it's not re-potted to allow the roots to grow, it will

wilt, and not self actualise or become the plant it is.

It will also be relying too much on another nearby

shoot and not be itself.

 

This will then create all sorts of other problems

around it, because without their needs being met,

it will become a poorly plant. They need food,

water, earth, light, and love.

 

To revive a plant, look at the why's, addressing any

problems if you can, though you may need to give

the plant a little time to recover and get used to it's

new routine...

 

They do say that plants respond well to talking to

in a loving manner, and are very good listeners. 

 

 

Who am I?  I'm Sally Hope Woodroffe a Professional, Registered

Counsellor, Hypnotherapist, Artist, Musician, Singer Songwriter,

prolific creative woman hopefully creating a better world in many

ways.  You can join me at

 

My Facebook page

https://www.facebook.com/Absolutely-Fabulous-Minds-RC-168719803282054/

www.absolutelyfabulousminds.com or email at sally@absolutelyfabulousminds.com and subscribe here to receive

various goodies and competitions!

 

 

 

Who me, procrastinate?



 



What Procrastination, who me?

No matter what good intentions we may have, a new year’s resolution, a plan to start exercising, to look at our own problems, to learn, to start that course etc. – there’s so many other things, to take our time during the day…

Add to that, children, work, husbands etc., then we wake up two weeks later and think…

‘Hang on a minute, I’d forgotten all about that, and I’d really promised myself to do this…! And I didn’t even start!’

It takes a strong woman, no, really it does, to keep on track of what you want to do!  And know that, that very action is what differentiates us, from those that stay in the same rut, always dreaming never taking action, and reaching what we want to!

But, it’s okay, don’t beat yourself up, cos you are here now, NOW you can do something about it!

But before we do, let’s look at what else is taking over your mind.  You subscribe to a really cool writing course, that sends you a free group, and daily work to do, you want to help back others, friends and email them, your notifications send you an email every comment, every time anybody makes any move at all!

Before you know it you have 20 emails coming in every day that takes half an hour to sort and deal with, it’s like you’ve created your own world of procrastination!  Maybe that competition you entered that you WON! A free course, that still sits in your downloads waiting to be started, waiting for your commitment, waiting to move you forward…

Get off the internet!  NOW, move away from that email list, Facebook, whatever it is…and focus

What are the blocks that stop you from the very action that will take you forward?

Is it all the background noise going on around you?  Maybe you have to cull your emails, focus on each step, one step at a time.  You’re not really giving yourself the best chance otherwise.

Are you scared to move forward?  Ask yourself why?  Won’t your relationship, job, situation be so much better when you do? What is it that scares you?  Why stay, in what you don’t want?

Change, that is the only thing we can depend on, and if you dig you’re heels in, you will stagnate, it’s a moving world, you need to move with it.  Begin to believe in yourself, you are worthy, you are ‘allowed’ your dreams and all that is needed is your focus…one small step by another small step

So, yes it’s okay, okay to slip, to not even start, but as my mentor said once,

‘failure is, not getting back up again’

And I really do believe you can do this, so make the commitment, say a time each day or week to commit to it, you really have got this!  Any further thoughts please do get in touch – I wish you big progress.  And if you are unsure of which way to go, then come and join us here for some inspiration, something for everyone, and check out my new course to really move forward ‘Cinderella to Princess’ and let’s begin NOW… I’ve got your back



Empowerment begins here!

 

Thought I'd answer a few questions that have come up about the Cinderella to Princess Course, cos I've been asked them by a few of you...

 

What is the idea behind the Cinderella to Princess course?

Therapies are not always available, but, there's also the reluctance from you, sometimes to accept help?  With that in mind, I felt I could provide a course, for women specifically, (and yet no, I'm not excluding you men if you're willing to do the work) so that you could begin to help yourself.  

I'm all about empowering individuals,  and I felt, with some directional tools, you could begin to think reflectively about your life, your thoughts, beliefs and morals? These are all life choices to be made, but then throw in life experiences, and obviously that changes everything.  Very often, you don't realise you have these choices to decide.

You have to really want, to make a better life, for yourself, really feel, a commitment to doing the work, to keep determined step by step!  I’m thinking, if there’s things you’re wondering about, rather than serious, life challenges of course, then some of the work can be, begun by yourself.  Yes, this is dependent on you as an individual.

If you’ve chosen the stand alone course, rather than one to one therapy, then decide you want to discuss some things, then individual sessions can be arranged.

Sometimes doing this sort of work can stir up feelings, that may definitely need working with, to give you the right support.

I do provide Free consultations prior to one to one sessions.

Why is the course different from every other course?

I’m incorporating exercises, even meditations, and addressing a popular topic and current day issue of many, of lack of self-worth or esteem.  I’ve witnessed how this has such a negative effect across the whole of your life, if support or encouragement from those close to you is not given.

It creates a feeling of being downtrodden, unsure of which way to turn, and not even realising or seeing, your own power, making you easy victims for those who’ll take advantage, roll in Cinderella!

So this is, the Cinderella to Princess idea, it’s only from looking at the way you treat and think of yourself, or the lack of self-love, you realise, that inner work, needs to be done. 

The course is different to other courses, because, though it is, an online one, you still can arrange added access with me, through private counselling sessions.  I would hate anyone to feel, there is nowhere to go.

Why do I feel this work is so important out there?

None of us are taught parenting skills, or life or relationship skills in school, you’ve probably never considered, that ‘you’ choose ‘how you’ want your life to be, possibly, very differently, from your parents lives.  You tend to think of yourself as a continuation of your parents, not as an individual, which really, you're not.  What if you had maladaptive parents? How will you ever know how to start, to change things?

Thing is it’s okay, to have different ideas to your parents, there really 'shouldn’t' be world war two to know this?  It’s text book stuff really, but 'should' be taught to kids and especially teens and a lot of ‘adults’ too!

How can any of us grow, to have decent relationships with anyone, when we really don’t know, who we are ourselves?

Why specialise with empowering teens/women of all ages?

Equality is not always there for women, you're luckier in the western world, but the whole world has not caught up yet, it’s still quite shocking that this is the truth!

Only 10% of women in the western world are in the top earning bracket of jobs.  Culminating in our whole world not being balanced, with the compassionate/feminine and strong/masculine traits to create that harmony.

It’s so much easier to educate women with good self-esteem, than, as in my profession, attempt to repair the damage done, caused by lack of self-esteem.

Most of my work at the moment, is dealing with the damage from 50’s/60’s/70’s women’s childhoods.  If you were one of them, you know how little you were encouraged in those days.

But it’s also shocking to see present day kids , deal with the modern world of perfectionism they live in, and taking that on board, what sort of a role model is that?  It’s like being human is not expected from you anymore? It doesn’t promote inner work of who you are from within.  That means that it's very important, for current teens, and women of all ages to know, that you can, take back your power, by doing this work, by realising you do have choices, to take your freedom as a free thinking woman in this world.  

Here's the link to more details of the  Cinderella to Princess course

 

Who am I?  I'm Sally Hope Woodroffe a Professional, Registered Counsellor, Hypnotherapist, Artist, Musician, Singer Songwriter, prolific creative woman hopefully creating a better world in many ways.  You can join me at www.absolutelyfabulousminds.com or email at sally@absolutelyfabulousminds.com and subscribe here to receive various goodies and competitions!

 

Keeping the doors open to good stuff

You know that feeling, when you retract, when you get scared? You feel it in your stomach, like a fight or flight feeling?  When you feel vulnerable, lost, alone? It makes you feel smaller, in your energy, what your putting out.

Then all the doors close shut.  Whatever energy has been flowing out of you, halts.  Your energy, world and directions all become closed and tightened, like you've locked the doors, drawn up the portcullis and no-one can reach in to you.

You may know you're doing this, because you WILL feel it.  It can be a feeling of hopelessness, and a complete letting go of everything.  In some cases that can be useful, because your fears show you what it is you need to be face?

Cos lets face it, unless you face your fears, they will always be there?  How can you know how to deal with them if you don't look at them?  Our stomachs are our emotional centres, so 'her stomach dropped' is an expression of this, we physically feel our emotions, good or not so good.

In fact our true deep down emotions control our health, our mind has a great part in regulating our body.  If you've got stuff going on, for goodness sake let it out! Emotion is meant to be felt, not bottled up to explode one day with the straw that broke the camels back because it couldn't take any more.

We live in a supposed 'civilisation'? that doesn't seem to recognise that yes, its okay to ask for help, it's actually courageous, in the UK we see it as weak, someone with mental health issues, yes well we are all human, and not machines!

And how strange that if your in the USA everyone has 'therapy' in fact, it is almost a status symbol?

'Oh, what? you mean you don't have a therapist?'  

Everyone has one, it's completely normal, no-one sees it as a knock on yourself personally, or 'oh she couldn't cope, poor thing' Why and when are we going to realise that, yes, we all need help sometimes, that is what facing our fears is about, is it not?

We may get a therapist like Tracy Ullman in Ali Mcbeal, who suggests a 'theme song' ha! no I'm not suggesting that, and no, that's not part of my therapy,  but, if it helps why not?  Cos everyone is different, everyone is unique, and reacts to different things. 

That is why, you cannot speak about a whole nation of 'mental health' needs and stereotype them all in one bag.  These are people we're talking about, and I love the way others teach you so much, if your willing to learn, of course.  Me, I learn from so many different people, because everyone you come across has their own story, their own wonderful, amazing strength, wisdom and teaching.

And that is why, you have to open the doors, and 'feel' in life, in therapy, and even as a therapist.  None of it follows the norm, none of it does what it says on the box, none of it makes any sense sometimes!  But, we as humans, are all the same in that we, carry on with whatever does it for us, whatever drives us, no matter how difficult and seemingly impossible sometimes.

Sorting out what we don't want, thinking and focusing on what we do want, opening the doors for good things to flow freely in. 

Sometimes, we just have to let go, not hold on too tightly, allow ourselves to just be.  To be unsure,

to be vulnerable, to listen, to learn, to express emotion.  In all it's colours, textures and combinations.

 

And after you've expressed how you feel, no matter what, be kind to yourself, give to yourself, be gentle and respectful and allow yourself some self care, some love, even a cup of warm soothing tea


Because we are human, divine, miraculous, impossibly resilient and courageous - most of the time we do it all with a smile on our face and hopefully, passion in our hearts, what else is there? 


But it's realising that we are all these things, that is something huge to be grateful for, as in Ian Dury's hit 'Reasons to be cheerful part three' okay I do have theme songs, or more rather, songs that play through my head but are ever changing.


I told you we're all different.  Never be scared to show that your human, because that's what we all are.




Who am I?  I'm Sally Hope Woodroffe a Professional, Registered Counsellor, Hypnotherapist, Artist, Musician, Singer Songwriter, prolific creative woman hopefully creating a better world in many ways.  You can join me at www.absolutelyfabulousminds.com or email at sally@absolutelyfabulousminds.com and subscribe here to receive various goodies and competitions!

Do you relate to this?

There’s something important I need to say, about me, but, I have to say it because it may be about you too.  If your anything like me, then you will feel this sometimes.

I was always a shy kid, didn’t make friends easily, I was always friendly, but, making friends didn’t happen naturally like it did for others?  My friends at school were all the kids that no-one wanted to be friends with, multi-cultural kids or the quiet thinking book worm ones.

I wasn’t shouty, dramatist, uniquely clever or dull – just going through the motions, hating all sport!  I loved books, but in school, ‘War of the Roses’ at 9? Seriously?  I always felt I was the observer, watching everything play out around me.  I guess I was quite serious and thoughtful; like I was born adult.

Forward 50 years, still the same! I can see now, why I’m good at listening, why I have the patience, others wouldn’t have, why I can give my undivided attention to someone 100% - that comes easy to me, in fact I’ve been doing it all my life as the listener.

Here’s where it gets difficult, they say in marketing, to be yourself, which is kind of missing the first hurdle? Because I’m not talky talky, I’m more listen y listen y and I’m saying this, cos you may feel it too.  In every group there’s the mad one, the crazy one, the serious one, the drama queen, the feeling one, and the quiet one.

That’s not to say I don’t have a wicked sense of humor, I love laughing, and, if I can say so myself, be very funny as my ‘timing’ is usually perfect, it’s the ‘way’ you tell ‘em!  I was born expressing, music, lyrics, singing, writing, feeling, growing.

And that’s all I can be, myself, that’s all I want to be, myself, the deep thinker, the philosopher, the woman who paints ‘whatever’ with her heart, creates whatever, with all she has, puts into each and everything the best she can. 

I don’t believe in doing anything half measures, I have a strict ‘observer’ observing me, I’m the one who can replay conversations days later, untangling them almost like I have a replay button! Yeah I know weird right? But true.  I work at seeing links that stick in my mind, that tease me, so that I have to gently approach them and, while they’re not looking, cajole them out, like a kitten hiding under the step, to bring them out, to untangle them, look at them.

Then they show themselves, and eureka it’s a breakthrough, a moment of realization, that you cannot ‘put off’ otherwise it will fly away, if you do.  No, you have to take the tail now! And run with it, that is the only way of catching it

I guess that’s one of my failings, attempting to re-create the wheel, but it has to be worth doing well in my life, otherwise I don’t see the point.  So, yeah sometimes I feel like the dreamer, but that’s who I am.   In a medieval world I would be the astrologer, the philosopher, and the bard – either that or I’d be living on a hilltop.  Some things never change?   

I’ve connected spiritually in many ways.  It’s that question, if your listening to your mind, who is it that is answering?   That’s not to say, I’d tell you, well you may as well leave him now, because it’s your journey not mine, and you cannot ‘force’ others to grow. Their journey should be their own.

I guess I see using these ‘gifts’ like being told truths, without having to experience it? It won’t mean anything, like taking mind altering drugs to open neural pathways, you’re really not prepared for.

Yes of course this is about me, but I felt it was important, because some of you would really relate to it…

Some thinker musings…

Who am I?  I'm Sally Hope Woodroffe a Professional, Registered Counsellor, Hypnotherapist, Artist, Musician, Singer Songwriter, prolific creative woman hopefully creating a better world in many ways.  You can join me at www.absolutelyfabulousminds.com or email at sally@absolutelyfabulousminds.com and subscribe here to receive various goodies and competitions!