Wednesday 17 February 2016

Keeping the doors open to good stuff

You know that feeling, when you retract, when you get scared? You feel it in your stomach, like a fight or flight feeling?  When you feel vulnerable, lost, alone? It makes you feel smaller, in your energy, what your putting out.

Then all the doors close shut.  Whatever energy has been flowing out of you, halts.  Your energy, world and directions all become closed and tightened, like you've locked the doors, drawn up the portcullis and no-one can reach in to you.

You may know you're doing this, because you WILL feel it.  It can be a feeling of hopelessness, and a complete letting go of everything.  In some cases that can be useful, because your fears show you what it is you need to be face?

Cos lets face it, unless you face your fears, they will always be there?  How can you know how to deal with them if you don't look at them?  Our stomachs are our emotional centres, so 'her stomach dropped' is an expression of this, we physically feel our emotions, good or not so good.


In fact our true deep down emotions control our health, our mind has a great part in regulating our body.  If you've got stuff going on, for goodness sake let it out! Emotion is meant to be felt, not bottled up to explode one day with the straw that broke the camels back because it couldn't take any more.


We live in a supposed 'civilisation'? that doesn't seem to recognise that yes, its okay to ask for help, it's actually courageous, in the UK we see it as weak, someone with mental health issues, yes well we are all human, and not machines!

And how strange that if your in the USA everyone has 'therapy' in fact, it is almost a status symbol?

'Oh, what? you mean you don't have a therapist?'  

Everyone has one, it's completely normal, no-one sees it as a knock on yourself personally, or 'oh she couldn't cope, poor thing' Why and when are we going to realise that, yes, we all need help sometimes, that is what facing our fears is about, is it not?

We may get a therapist like Tracy Ullman in Ali Mcbeal, who suggests a 'theme song' ha! no I'm not suggesting that, and no, that's not part of my therapy,  but, if it helps why not?  Cos everyone is different, everyone is unique, and reacts to different things. 

That is why, you cannot speak about a whole nation of 'mental health' needs and stereotype them all in one bag.  These are people we're talking about, and I love the way others teach you so much, if your willing to learn, of course.  Me, I learn from so many different people, because everyone you come across has their own story, their own wonderful, amazing strength, wisdom and teaching.

And that is why, you have to open the doors, and 'feel' in life, in therapy, and even as a therapist.  None of it follows the norm, none of it does what it says on the box, none of it makes any sense sometimes!  But, we as humans, are all the same in that we, carry on with whatever does it for us, whatever drives us, no matter how difficult and seemingly impossible sometimes.

Sorting out what we don't want, thinking and focusing on what we do want, opening the doors for good things to flow freely in. 

Sometimes, we just have to let go, not hold on too tightly, allow ourselves to just be.  To be unsure,
to be vulnerable, to listen, to learn, to express emotion.  In all it's colours, textures and combinations.

 
And after you've expressed how you feel, no matter what, be kind to yourself, give to yourself, be gentle and respectful and allow yourself some self care, some love, even a cup of warm soothing tea


Because we are human, divine, miraculous, impossibly resilient and courageous - most of the time we do it all with a smile on our face and hopefully, passion in our hearts, what else is there? 


But it's realising that we are all these things, that is something huge to be grateful for, as in Ian Dury's hit 'Reasons to be cheerful part three' okay I do have theme songs, or more rather, songs that play through my head but are ever changing.


I told you we're all different.  Never be scared to show that your human, because that's what we all are.




Who am I?  I'm Sally Hope Woodroffe a Professional, Registered Counsellor, Hypnotherapist, Artist, Musician, Singer Songwriter, prolific creative woman hopefully creating a better world in many ways.  You can join me at www.absolutelyfabulousminds.com or email at sally@absolutelyfabulousminds.com and subscribe here to receive various goodies and competitions!